Pairs Self Critique/Process
I enjoyed my final product “Mirrors” from the Light Line Space project so I wanted to extend the concept for the Pairs project. I considered color and a reflection of myself, maybe in a TV. I have been watching a lot of Black Mirror so I originally wanted to choose a topic that more explicitly involved technology. I was also thinking about my obsession with my self-image and how I want to escape this. Concepts with technology became a bit complex so I decided to focus more on the idea of trying to escape my own self-image.
I took a couple practice photos before Julia helped me take my source photos. I used photoshop to create my actual source photo. I like this photo quite a lot even though I did a messy job of editing.
I did quite a few studies to figure out the composition and colors I wanted to use as well as get a better understanding of the image. To scale up the image Prof. Emerson suggested that I use a projector which was such a good move, I saved so much time that would have been spent stressing over proportions. I used that time instead to focus on color and my technique.
The studies excited me, but almost as soon as I started working on the final I knew I would be disappointed with it visually. The photoshopped source image actually felt like it could have been a final product to me, which I think caused the frustration I felt with the piece. I do not think the medium really added anything to the piece that could not have been achieved in photoshop. This realization was extremely productive for me though, and in the future, I will make sure to think more deeply about how the image I am choosing to portray relates to the medium.
My end product actually involves technology in a way that is as inescapable as it is. For such a long time I thought there was a right way to look because of the society I have been raised in. Now technology is inherent in perpetuating beauty ideals. This piece is titled “Instagram” as it meant to investigate the way we are pushed to create images of ourselves on social media that may conflict with our lived realities. My work also seems to deal with dysphoria whether I am thinking about it actively or not.
I had another idea in my mind for pairs that I am glad I was able to execute. I enjoy representations of romance and relationships, so originally I wanted to make a work of me and my boyfriend. But I realized I could not get a source picture of us without it being inauthentic. During my work on the first phase of Pairs, I saw this photo of my friend (Yen) and their boyfriend on Instagram and I was really drawn to it.
It is what I wanted to capture in my own relationship- an authentic, deep moment. It is actually unclear how Yen is feeling, their boyfriend seems protective, and there is an intense intimacy that attracted me.
The drawing is pretty simple but I think the charcoal gives the image an interesting equality of tone. I have difficulty with going darker and using more shadows so I tried to challenge myself to go darker when I could. I am glad that I included the motif of the weaving over their figures. It gives the drawing a darkness, it could indicate the fear of the outside world or the tangle within their relationship that exists because of the clashes of their personalities.
Overall this piece is a lot more satisfying to me. During the critique, everyone seemed to be quite attracted to it. I enjoyed working with this subject matter a lot so it is definitely something I would like to continue with.
